YuGiOh! Ring of Power
by Padmejem
Summary: A Lord of the RingsYu-Gi-Oh! crossover. Chapters start off short, getting longer, due to lacks of caffeine. (Major OOCs, will have you in fits of laughter, and most likely, in some cases, snickering for life.)
1. The vortex

Yu-Gi-Oh! Ring of Power

Padme: So, we're actually writing something good.

  
Sekhme: We are, hikari?   
Anakin: Well, she seems enthusiastic about it.   
Sekhme: Thats a start, I guess.   
Padme: DISCLAIMER, DAMMIT!   
Anakin: Alright, alright, already.   
Yami no Bakura: I'll do it.   
Anakin: Pfft. Whatever.   
Yami no Bakura: Padmejem does not own Yu-Gi-Oh! or Lord of the Rings. Though she would like, it's not going to happen.   
Padme: It's not? ;-;   
Anakin: No. 

* * *

Chapter One:

It was one of those days, in Domino City. One where a certain starfish-haired boy reckoned something strange was going to happen.   
/Yami, do you also believe today is strange?/   
The voice inside his head did not answer.   
/YAMI!/ the boy named Yugi almost yelled through his mind link.   
//Wha? Sorry, hikari, I was...asleep...//   
/Five thousand year old spirits...asleep?/   
//Yup, you got that right, hikari.//   
Yugi went his normal way, towards the building known as school. 'Jou!'   
'Yug!' the tall blonde answered, with his usual grin. The two trudged on to class, is the normal, dreary fashion, followed by a silent CEO, with his silver suitcase.   
'Aving a bad day, Kaiba?' Jou asked, still grinning like a deranged hyena.   
'Quiet koinu. Mokuba broke his wrist this morning...Trying out the duel disks. At least now I know why the executives think it's too heavy for a young child to handle...must work on that.'   
'And re-employ them too?' giggled Yugi.   
'And re-employ them too...' added the tall brunette coldly. Seto had a tendency to dismiss anyone who annoyed him and Mokuba unnessecarily. 

The lecture that morning was so dreary, Yugi wondered whether Kaiba's deadpan voice could actually rival the lecturer's.   
Kaiba was about to scream out 'SHUT THE HELL UP', when the most ridiculously happy sound came from the main building. The bell.   
Yugi could have sworn he heard Seto breath a sigh of relief. 

As they were dismissed from class that afternoon, the three of them noted something quite odd. Okay, extremely odd...Possibly quite ridiculous.   
'Why is there a huge swirling vortex of black in the middle of the yard?' said Seto, raising an eyebrow.   
'Your guess is as good as mine....' Yugi scratched his temple in puzzlement.   
Each stepped towards it curiously.   
//Aibou, it wouldn't be a good idea to go near that thing...It doesn't look safe...// Yami said anxiously through Yugi's link.   
Yugi ignored his yami, even though it was hard to, knowing he would probably scream it at Yugi three or four times to try and get his attention.   
The trio stood there for a while, pondering the age old question. 'To risk, or not to risk?'   
Risk, obviously. Jou, being the most impulsive, dived straight into the swirling black hole.   
/Do you think it's an entry to the Shadow Realm, aibou?/ Yugi asked Yami worredly.   
//Don't think so, I would be able to tell...// the reply was confident, yet disturbed somehow.   
A trio of yells came from behind Yugi and Kaiba.   
'Hey Yugi-kun! Seto-kun!' Malik, Ryou and Bakura chorused together...grinning similarly to the way Jou usually did.   
'What's with the swirling vortex of doom, Yug?' Ryou blinked.   
'It don't look like a Shadow Realm portal, hikari...Where's Jou?' Bakura ruffled his white hair idly.   
Kaiba and Yugi pointed towards the void with perfect synch. Malik sweatdropped.   
'Isn't that just like Jou? We'd better follow. Can't leave him to drown in a swirly black mass, can we?'   
What can only can be described as a sigh was emitted from Kaiba's vocals at that moment. 

The five of them took a pace toward it, before being sucked into it without warning.   
And so, a white-haired tomb-robber, his overly kawaii look-a-like, a tall CEO, a tanned blonde smothered with gold,   
and a guy who looked like he had a starfish on his head, pummelled towards wherever they were going. 

* * *

Padme: You like? Sorry it's a little short, but I haven't had my caffeine shot today...   
Anakin: Well, I may not be included in this fic, but I can tell that that tomb-thief of yours is going to cause all hell to break loose.   
Yami no Bakura: Say another word, and it's the Shadow Realm for you.   
Padme: Not to mention uncleaned 5000-year-old toilets. 

And R&R! -gives out cookies- 


	2. Mister Greenleaf

Yu-Gi-Oh! Ring of Power

Padme: Well, as you can see, I'm adding a second chapter. Yayyy. -waves pompoms-   
Bakura: And now that you've had your caffeine shot, you're going to write a decent chappie, right?   
Seto: As decent as possible.   
Padme: Disclaimer, people!   
Anakin: Padmejem does not own Yu-Gi-Oh! or Lord of the Rings, and blah blah blah.   
Padme: Good enough. 

* * *

Chapter Two:

'We always seem to end up in each others' mess-ups, don't we, Motou?' yelled Seto through the swirly blackness.   
Yugi ignored him, trying to make a connection with his yami. He didn't seem to be there...like a part of him was missing...   
/Yami? Yami?/ Yugi whimpered pathetically through his mind link. It was a known fact between them, that Yugi disliked...darkness.   
Ryou was clinging to Bakura like his life depended on it, though it seemed the white-haired thief was not too pleased.   
Malik was clinging to his Sennen Rod like it was some kind of mental security, with a huge sweatdrop hanging off his temple.   
Through Malik's random Egyptian cursing, Yugi constant whimpering, and Ryou and Bakura idiotic clinging and wailing, Seto managed   
to spot a small amount of light.   
'Exit at twelve o'clock!' the CEO bellowed at the squealing, whimpering, sweatdropping group.   
'I'm not wearing a watch!' squealed Ryou without thinking, he clung to his yami fiercely, whom looked as if he was thinking how   
pleasant it would be to gag Ryou with his own foot.   
They were then slammed head first into a bush, Seto first, followed by Yugi, and then Ryou, Bakura, and Malik, who was still clinging to   
Sennen Rod for dear life. 

/Yami?/ Yugi squeaked again.   
'I'm right here, Yugi...' a voice next to him replied.   
You could say Yugi squealed and gasped at the same time, because that is exactly what he did.   
Bakura snickered. 'We'll just be leaving you two alone now, shall we?'   
Yami growled. 'Want to visit the Realm of Shadows, again?'   
Bakura chuckled sadistically. 'Anything to make your life a misery, frangipani...'   
A large vein popped out on the Pharaoh's temple. 

'Can I help you, strangers?' A tall blonde male was standing over them quite suddenly.   
Malik stood up quite suddenly. 'He doesn't look human. Be on your guard...'   
Seto, of course, took a different approach.   
'We. Are. From. A. Distant. Land. We. Come. In. Peace...'   
The blonde raised an eyebrow.   
'Well, you better come with me then, the recent incidents of late concern all creatures of Middle Earth...'   
Ryou cocked an eyebrow. 'Middle Earth?' he muttered quietly.   
The blonde lead them quite far from the place they had...collapsed, ignoring muttering from Seto and Bakura on how odd his attire was.   
'My name is Legolas Greenleaf, I am an elf...and we are headed for Rivendell.'   
'An elf?' enquired Yugi, 'Aren't they supposed to have little bells and green hats?'   
Legolas shot him a puzzled look. 'Apparently not.' 

After each being taught the basics of riding a horse, -including Seto's feet dragging along the ground, Bakura's horse taking off in fright,   
and Yugi not being able to reach the stirrups,- the elf lead them on to Rivendell.   
'So, how long does it take, to reach...Riverdile?' asked Malik, finally getting the hang of riding his equine.   
The blonde elf chuckled. 'About two days ride from here to...Riverdile, as you say.'   
Seto looked as if he was about to barf. 'Two...days...on...a....mangy, smelly animal...' he mumbled.   
The horse Seto was riding gave a loud snort of disapproval, stamping one ivory hoof.   
'I think Voriel heard what you said...' Legolas let out a chuckle.   
Nevertheless, Seto continued complaining the whole day. 

The band stopped at a large rock formation, which the elf called some unpronounceable elvish name. Yugi and Yami climbed down from   
their exceedingly bad tempered ride, which promptly stormed off to mope in some corner of their makeshift camp.   
Seto's latest complaint had been that they could have at least brought marshmallows.   
It became rather late, and Malik crawled off to a slab of rock, clutching his Sennen Rod as a child would it's blanket.   
Seto continually muttered rude curses under his breath until they became sleepier, and sleepier, and he fell asleep with his head in a bush.   
_'These are strange people,'_ thought the elf, _'Strange, but perhaps they may aid us...Lord Elrond's call might have reached beyond   
Middle Earth...Perhaps it is they are far more strange thsn I first imagined.'_   
Yami was cradling Yugi like a childs teddy bear, and Yugi, who was snoring loudly, kept hitting Yami's hair with one hand.   
Legolas was beginning to become disturbed by Bakura's constant sleep-rambling, -'Blood, blood! Pretty reds and bloodness!', - and so   
wandered towards the only source of fresh water in the area...A muddy puddle.   
Legolas peered into the water thoughtfully for a while. A long while. And he let out a sigh.   
'Oh my, how ugly do I look in this water...Oh the shame, the shame...'   
And the night's peace was broken, by a narcassic elf. 

* * *

Padme: Well, I did get a little further with caffeine...Heehee. Caffeine...   
Anakin: Well yes, but...Not that far.   
Sekhme: Stop criticising my hikari, dammit!   
Padme: Oh, and the next chapter, they reach Rivendell! And find something they lost. ^^   
Yami no Bakura: Shhh! 

And don't forget to R&R! 


	3. Black Riders

Yu-Gi-Oh! Ring of Power

Padme: And so, we have the next chapter of Yu-Gi-Oh! Ring of Power.   
Anakin: Any guesses what happens in this part?   
Padme: -growl- If you say a word, say the disclaimer.   
Anakin: The disclaimer.   
Yami no Bakura: Shuttup, both of you. I'm saying it. NO OWN, NO SUE. Blah blah blah.   
***   
**Elvish Violinist of Ra: Merf. I know, my grammar makes it hard. XD**   
Yami no Bakura: At least it's not as bad as it used to be... 

**YugisGal16: Don't worry, I'm writing it down everytime something funny goes through this deranged head of mine...**   
Seto: It's true. She just bought 400 sheets of file paper. 

**Manga-nut: Don't worry, Anakin's just my muse. He follows me everywhere...And I've taken the name 'Padme' for quite a while now.**

Anyhow, on with the story! =D 

* * *

Chapter Three:

'Ewwww! Hikari, you're dribbling on me!' came the voice of a very pissed-off Bakura waking up at the crack of dawn.   
'Whaa?' a sleepy Ryou opened one brown eye lazily.   
'You were drooling on me, and I should pound the living day--'   
'Shhh!' Legolas hissed audibly.   
'Huh?' Bakura raised an eyebrow.   
'Wake the others. Now.' the elf didn't seem too happy for some reason, but Ryou went to shake Seto from his...snoring concerto. 

A shadowy figure emerged from behind the rocks. It was draped in ebony, and there was an evil air around it worse than the Shadow Realm itself.   
The awakened Malik gave a petrified squeal. 

'Rarehunters!' and dived behind Yami and Yugi in fright. 

Ryou continued to shake Seto rapidly, resulting in only mutterings of 'Mokuba, it's two in the morning,' or 'You're fired, you useless bag!'.   
Legolas was too busy dealing out a number of shots to a certain explicable area of said Black Rider, to fetch the horses and escape. Malik was cringing pitifully behind a snoring Yami, who was still clutching Yugi with one arm. Ryou shook Seto harder, and Bakura looked on, snickering like a rabid hyena.   
Seto sat up with a start. 

'YOU'RE FIRED KATSUYA JOUNOUCHI!!' A dramatically pointed finger hitting Ryou in the eye.   
'Erm...' Ryou said, while rubbing his eye, 'Jou isn't here, Kaiba...'   
Seto sweatdropped. 'Oh.'   
Bakura was staring at the Pharaoh and his hikari's sleep-activities, snickering insanely. 'Hikari, you'd better wake those two up.'   
Ryou turned, and went quite red at the sight. 'Erm...Yes, that would be a good idea...' 

Legolas finally managed to throw the mass of black cloak into a ditch, the thing then proceeded to wail pathetically, and climb back onto it's horse.   
Seto and Bakura then proceeded to shake the Pharaoh very unceremoniously.   
'OI! Frangipani! How about you stop patting your hikari's ass, and we can get out of here!' Bakura screamed into Yami's ear. 

The result was instantaneous.   
'Tomb robber!' Yami leapt from his resting place, grabbing at Bakura's throat.   
Yugi opened an eye very sleepily. 

'What are you doing, aibou?' he yawned. 'Oh, it's just you and Bakura having a wrestling match again, I'm...going back to sleep...'   
The mayhem finally subsided, after Yami was reluctantly pried from Bakura's throat, growling very foul Egyptian curses, and Malik was dragged from the bush he was hiding in. The group proceeded onwards, with regular complaints from Seto about how his feet were still dragging along the ground, and that his horse was "No better than a Shetland pony with fleas". Of course, the question of breakfast then became present. 

'When's food?' Malik growled, closely followed by his stomach.   
'We'll get food when we reach Rivendell,' replied Legolas quite calmly. 'And I'm sure you'll enjoy it.'   
'By the way, I'm Malik, this is Ryou, his yami, Bakura, Seto, and Yami and Yugi.' Malik said, introducing all his friends, since they were still pondering their growling bellies.   
'Thank goodness one of decided to introduce. You already know my name, thank goodness.' Legolas cocked an eyebrow.   
Their conversation was rudely interrupted by growling from Yugi's empty stomach. Yami sweatdropped next to him. Bakura started to cackle sadistically, and fell flat on his face. Ryou promptly pulled on the reins sharply. This only caused the horse to rear up and slam it's front hooves down on Bakura buttocks. There was a loud bellowing of 'BLOODY ANIMAL!' to follow this.   
The trek towards the place known as "Rivendell", was long, and eventful. Seto got his foot stuck in the reins somehow, Yugi had to restrain Yami from sending their horse to the Shadow Realm for bucking, and Malik dropped his Rod six times. This caused great annoyance for the elf. 

'Have any of you EVER ridden a horse before?'   
'Nope.' replied Ryou sheepishly, clinging to his yami and they walked...very slowly.   
The elf shook his head in frustration. Why did he pick up these strangers in the first place? They seemed lost, perhaps. 

On approach to Rivendell, Seto's jawline dropped a few inches.   
'Holy hell...Whoever did that landscaping...is doing my gardening.' the CEO's eyes widened.   
'Ah, shuddup Kaiba, you're enough of a fruit in those clothes already.' Bakura smirked sadistically, watching the vein pop out on Kaiba's temple.   
They were greeted by another elf, tall, but less finely dressed than their friend, Legolas.   
Suddenly, a familiar voice sounded out from behind them.   
'Hey Yug! How d'you get here!'   
They turned to see a certain blonde, wearing what looked like a medieval fancy-dress costume and a green trenchcoat. 

* * *

Padme: So? Chapters getting longer?   
Yami no Bakura: A horse...stood....on...my...ass....   
Anakin: Yes, Bakura-kun. Now, people, don't forget to R&R! 


	4. Elrond's Feast

Yu-Gi-Oh! Ring of Power

**Padme:** Well, welcome to another ridiculously funny chapter of 'Ring of Power'.   
**Anakin:** As you can see, The group have arrived in Rivendell, where they found koin-- I mean, Jounouchi, who was wearing what looked like some weird green poncho.   
**Seto:** I still need a bigger horse...My boots are dirty.   
**Padme:** They were already dirty. 

Sabre-dragon: **Don't worry, it's going to get even more funny...**

Lissy: **Yes, well, Frodo and Sam don't play much of a part in this one...Though I'm not saying who gets the ring.**

Of course, there will be many on-going jokes in this fic...such as Seto's marshmallow fetish....And the war between Legolas and a certain other person on who is 'The prettiest'. 

Anyway, on with the fic. 

* * *

Chapter Four:

'Jou!' Yugi squealed and tackled his friend.   
Yami sweatdropped. 

'I take it you two know each other?' Legolas raised a dark eyebrow.   
'We lost him earlier on,' said Ryou. 'We've been wondering where he got to.' 

As promised, there was food. An extremely large amount of food, to Jounouchi's great, squealing, joy.   
Unfortunately, for Seto, there was only fish, and large amounts of sickly-sweet elven fruits. 

'No meat?' The brunette squeaked, as though there were tears about to start a flood from his dark-blue eyes.   
During the loud and unruly crunching, chewing and gulping of refreshments, a tall, dark-haired she-elf entered the room, quietly making her way across to one of the many balconies.   
She was followed by a group of short, hairy-footed creatures, and a man with such greasy hair, you couldn't tell whether it was black, or dark-brown. 

'Is he okay?' piped up the chubbiest of the three.   
'He is fine...' the elf replied, smiling quietly, as if daydreaming.   
Seto looked up from his plate, while Yami poked a large, knobbly fruit distastefully. 

The man seemed to have wandered off, Bakura had noticed him, and his elf companion.   
'Erf, Legolas, we seem to have company...' he inquired, still chewing his mouthful of fish.   
'Wha?' the elf flicked some blonde hair out of his food, and shot Bakura one of his usual puzzled looks.   
Bakura pointed discreetly at the tall she-elf. 

'Ah, Arwen Evenstar, so nice to see you.' Legolas bowed lightly.   
The others turned their heads slightly, and greeted the elf with a mouthful of food.   
'Eylo!' the group chorused, though Seto still stared blankly at his platter, fiddling with the fruit he had been offered. His stomach growled angrily.   
All the she-elf could do was stare at Yugi.   
'Nice hair...' she blinked. 

The feast was soon over...after a few whines from Seto managed to get Legolas to shoot a lean looking waterbird off the balcony for him.   
Seto actually enjoyed eating a half-charred animal, much to the disgust of the elvish onlookers.   
It soon became clear, a few minutes later, that Seto's stomach found it distasteful. He was hurredly rushed of to the infirmary area of the residence, clearly ready to throw up his breakfast from two weeks ago any moment.   
'Some...food...' Kaiba managed to splutter as he was escorted through a particularly flower-decorated archway. 

Seto was then taken to a room where he was shown to a bed, again, smothered with flowers.   
'Do my eyes deceive me? Do I se...a bed?' Seto's blue eyes swelled to twice their size, tears about to spill over them.   
A dark-haired elf with an even more frightening face than Bakura emerged from behind the doorway.   
'My name is Elrond...and I'm here to help.' he smiled, though Kaiba looked as though he was about to scream and run halfway to the ends of the earth.   
'Erm, erm...alright...' Seto replied, a rather petrified look on his features.   
One of the hairy-footed creatures poked his head around the door.   
'Is Mister Frodo awake, yet?'   
Seto stared at it, an eyebrow raised in disbelief. It was shorter than Yugi.   
'No, Master Gamgee, he hadn't yet woken up. You may go sit by him, if you like.' Elrond smiled again, extracting a whimper from Kaiba. 

'I do hope Seto's okay...' Ryou said to Yugi as he finished his third course of food.   
'I'm sure he's having a wonderful time...' giggled Jou through a mouthful of cream. 'Legolas tells me elves have great treatments for stomach ache.' 

Down in the elves' infirmary, Seto was being force-fed Elrond's home-made stomach-ache cure. Dried eagle tongue and horse flesh mixed with various foul-tasting herbs.   
Three elves had been called, one for restraining Seto's arms, one for holding his head back, and one for pising open the CEO's very relunctant jaws. This resulted in two of them being kicked in certain sensitive areas.   
'And he looked like such a refined being when I first saw him...' Elrond shook his head, after pouring the mix down Seto's throat and clamping his lips together tightly.   
Seto spluttered lightly, gasping for air.   
'Must get...water...'   
Elrond frowned. 'No, water'll just make it worse, Master Kaiba. Best lie down for a while.'   
Seto looked as if he wanted to take a a knife to Elrond's long, dark hair.   
He growled lowly, still clutching his stomach painfully. 

As the group got up from their meal, (Well, Jou was dragged) they noticed a subsequent number of arrivals.   
Bakura managed to point out to Malik that none of them were wearing riciulous jewellery.   
This was followed my a loud thwacking noise and a cry of 'Crap! That HURT!'.   
A short, red-haired humanoid waddled it's way past Malik, briefly stopping to throw the comment of 'What kind of an axe is that?' towards his Sennen Rod. 

Malik scowled. He had a definate feeling Seto was feeling a lot better than he was.   
'If he says anything about my hair...' Bakura flattened his hair sheepishly.   
'I wonder how Kaiba's doin'...' Jounouchi was close to cackling point, yet neither Yami nor Yugi could figure out why.   
'Erm, Jou, what's so funny?' Yugi asked, a look of complete bewilderment of his face.   
'Well, lets just say I was being sarcastic about the "Nice treatments for stomach ache"....' Jou started giggling uncontrollably.   
'Oh my!' Ryou exclaimed, accompanied by his usual shocked look.   
Even Yami looked a little disturbed. 'I do hope the bastard's okay...' 

'Stoppit! Noo! No more! Please! No mooorrre....' the wailing was now audible across the courtyard.   
'If you'd just sit still....' Elrond was getting rather pissed off.   
'No more icky, horrible, bad, distasteful...Elvish clothing!' The CEO was also pissed off, and struggled to throw off his new attire. 

It seemed Seto's distasteful elvish medicine was working. 

* * *

Padme: I'm sorry, okiday?   
Seto: -scowls- Sorry isn't good enough....   
Anakin: Stop whining, ya fruit.   
Sekhme: That wasn't nice.   
Seto: -tears well over- R-R-Read and Review...MY PAIN! ;-; 


	5. The Journey begins

Yu-Gi-Oh! Ring of Power

Padme: And welcome again to another chapter of Ring of Power!   
Anakin: And I shall recite the disclaimer---   
Mariku: Oh, no you don't. Padme-san does not own Yugioh or any of it's characters. Harhar.   
Anakin: -blink- Huh?   
Padme: I thought I told you to stay in your room, Mariku. 

**Serpent27:** Yup. Definately possible. 

**Yami Rose:** Ack, don't worry, I'm updating whenever I can. o.o 

* * *

Chapter Five:

'Jou!' Yugi prodded him hard. 'JOU!'   
Jounouchi jumped nearly a foot in the air.   
'Wha? Yug!' he rubbed his ribs irritably.   
'Lord Elrond's holding a Council...something about an eye, and a ring of some kind...'   
'Gahh, did Bakura steal something again?' Jou scowled. 'We always have to bail 'im outta things.'   
'I dunno.' Yugi shrugged.   
'Aibou, we'll be late!' Yami shot his head around the door, revealing a new assortment of silver and beige attire.   
Jou started giggling. 

The meeting was rather unorthodox, Seto thought. No suits, no desks, and why the hell was Lord Elrond wearing a tiara?   
Their company was several more pansy elves, bearded midgits of some kind, a tall, trampy looking guy with a walking stick, and more of those short, hairy-footed things. Seto frowned.   
'Hey Kaiba!' Malik yelled rather loudly across the meeting. 'Where'd yah get all the fruity clothes?' he snickered.   
'Actually, those are mine, Master Malik.' Elrond said, a flicker of laughter passing across his face.   
Malik said no more, and stared at the floor, muttering about people spoiling his fun. 

'Frodo, bring forth the ring.' Elrond looked at a dark-haired midgit, who walked forth, rather pale-faced to the stone tablet in the middle of the gathering.   
'Huh? Thats not mine?' Bakura yelped, raising a lilac eyebrow.   
Legolas snorted. 'Of course it isn't, you imbecile.'   
'This is the One ring. Forged by the Dark Lord Sauron.'   
A man stood up, and started rambling about how they could use this against a place called 'Mordor'.   
Elrond was constantly shooting him dirty looks, and Seto was half asleep by the end of it.   
'None of us can wield it...It must be destroyed.'   
At this point the red-haired shorty that had insulted Malik, got up and attempted to smash the small golden ring with his axe.   
The axe smashed alright, into a dozen littler pieces.   
Yami restrained a laugh.   
'The ring was made in the fire's of Mount Doom, and it is there it must be unmade.' Elrond gave another lecture. Yugi yawned.   
'You can't simply walk into Mordor...' the man who had been rambling delusionally said.   
Legolas stood up defiantly.   
'Have you heard nothing? The ring must be destroyed!' 

'I'm not taking it.' shrugged Bakura, 'I have a ring to carry already.'   
At this moment, a huge argument broke out, and Yugi covered his ears in irritation.   
'Aibou, should we say something?' Yami patted his hikari on the shoulder.   
'We don't know anything about this ring...What if nobody can carry it?'   
'I don't know about you, but I can't stand to see them argue like this. It's like Seto and Jou all over again.' Yami clutched his ears.   
Yugi whimpered. 'I will take it...' No one heard him.   
'Aibou?' Yami's eyes widened. Was Yugi actually volunteering?   
'I will take it!' Yugi yelled at the squabbling crowd, tears almost streaming down his face. 

'Just great.' muttered Malik as they were dragged along, back to their horses.   
'Frangipani's hikari-pretty volunteers for this "quest", and we get made into a fellowship, with an elf, a dwarfish lunatic, and a pair of pompous king-wannabes.'   
A squeal of 'Where's Sam an' Meester Frodo?' came from behind them. Two of the midgit creatures stumbled down the stone steps.   
Ryou turned around. 'Frodo? Sam? Who are they?'   
Legolas frowned. 'Oh dear. I believe they left this morning, with Lady Arwen.'   
'Oh...' the one known as Meriadoc stared at the floor blankly.   
'Can you take us back to the Shire, then? Mister Aragorn?'   
'No can do, Master hobbit, we're going to the Moutain of Doom.' Aragorn grinned sarcastically.   
'Ooooh, that sounds like fun, can we go too?' the other one piped up, about to do a tap dance with excitement.   
'Erm...' Aragorn sweatdropped.   
'We can?'   
'Pippin...' Aragorn raised an eyebrow.   
'Yay!' the two chorused together, running to find one of Elrond's spare horses.   
'Well, this is getting crowded...' Legolas blinked, restraining a giggle. 

They had barely been travelling for half a day, when everyone started complaining for the stomach's sake again.   
'When's elevensies?' squeaked Pippin, clinging to the exceedingly high horse.   
'We discussed this on the way to Rivendell...' Aragorn's temple had a vein popping out now.   
The tall wizard leading them skidded to a halt, before a pile of stones. 'Look....'   
'Looks like smoke...' Bakura muttered, who was having yet more trouble steering his horse.   
'I do not think that is smoke.....' Legolas said a little worredly.   
'Gandalf...What is that?' the dwarf asked the grey wizard.   
'Dunland spies....duck into the rocks, quick!'   
Ryou and Bakura dived into a bush without question, but Yugi and Yami stood there for a moment, pondering about 'spies'.   
'Oi! Frangipani! Ringbearer!' Bakura yelled, spitting out a mouthful of leaves.   
Without another moment to spare, Yami dragged his hikari away from the light.   
They sat there for a few moments.   
'I think they've gone...' squeaked Pippin.   
Malik poked his head out of the bush.   
'The path to Rohan is being watched...' said the tall man anxiously.   
'...And?' Yugi frowned.   
'We'll have to take the pass over the mountain...'   
Seto looked as if he was about to die.   
'M-m-m-more walking?' he stuttered.   
'Well you can't take the horses over the snow, can you, idiot?' Gandalf looked a little peeved, again. 

The company now had snow in their boots, snow in their hair, and in Yami's case, snow in other places.   
Yugi was beginning to feel tired. The wind was cold, the snow was wet, and what seemed like the voice of an extremely bad singer was on the breeze.   
Legolas stopped in his tracks. 'There is a foul voice on the air.'   
'That's obvious.' said Yugi. 'It needs singing lessons.'   
'It's Saruman!' Gandalf shouted, Malik blinkly in bewilderment.   
'Saucerpan?' he scratched his snow-ridden head. 'I don't get it...'   
A pile of ice shards and snow came tumbling down from above, hitting Gandalf square in the...hat.   
'My hat...' Gandalf now looked _very_ peeved.   
'You know, we could go through the Mines of Moria...' Gimli said in a very know-it-all voice.   
'Rrr...Let the Ringbearer decide.' Gandalf slammed his dented hat back over his head.   
Yugi looked around for a while.   
'We keep going. I don't like the dark.....' he clung to Yami.   
The company sighed. And their stomachs rumbled angrily. 

* * *

Padme: As you can see....I'M SCREWING WITH THE STORYLINE! ISN'T IT FUN! =D   
Anakin: Ah-huh...   
Yami no Bakura: Well, one thing's for sure. It's gonna be darn different, darnit.   
Mariku: Hikari-pretty needs kew-tips. o.0 

Padme: Review! Review! Review! =o 


	6. Fall of the Hat obsessed one

Yu-Gi-Oh! Ring of Power

Padme: So....I twisted the plot. Yay! =o   
Yami no Bakura: e.e   
Mariku: Ahuh...I'm sure.   
Anakin: Padmejem does not own Yu-Gi-Oh or Lord of the Rings.   
Mariku: HEY! 

* * *

Chapter Six

'Itssss sooo...cooolllddd...' Yugi shivered, as he was given a piggy-back by Aragorn.   
Yami scowled.   
'Well, it's not that way, by my part.' Seto smiled, pulling his foot out of the snow.   
'Yes, well, you got elven clothes, which by the way, make you look _even_ more fruity.' Bakura had turned blue with the cold.   
Ryou chattered his teeth in agreement, clinging to his yami. 

Malik and Legolas had started a ridiculous argument.   
'Just because you're prancing around in the snow like a deranged foal, does not make you the prettiest!'   
Legolas growled. 'I AM the prettiest!'   
Malik scowled. 'Are not!'   
'Are too!'   
'Are not!'   
'I am the PRETTIEST!' Legolas screamed into Malik's face.   
Malik was about to withdraw the dagger part of his Sennen Rod, when Gandalf tripped over his cloak.   
'Blasted cloak...' Gandalf spat snow as he spoke, brushing it off his beard.   
The day went slow, and it seemed to get colder and darker as it went.   
Seto was more sulky than usual. As they stopped for their midday rest, Aragron turned to the saddened CEO.   
'What saddens your heart, young one?' he asked, patting his brown hair lightly.   
'Well....' he paused.   
'Go on.'   
'It's my birthday.'   
Malik spun around.   
'You're kidding, right? It can't be.'   
'Fine, Ishtar..My birthday was _yesterday_.' his long frown seemed to lengthen. 

Yugi was beginning to understand why nobody wanted to take the ring. He was starting to feel...sleepy. Alone.   
'Yugi?' Yami had noticed the drowsy look in Yugi's amethyst eyes.   
'Nothing, aibou...' the boy had a stoned look about him.   
The group stopped, at the topmost of the peak. Legolas handed out some elven cloaks, to all, except Seto, who didn't particularly need one. Yami held his hikari next to him, the two of them shivering. The voice in Yugi's head was slowly becoming more clear. Yugi shook lightly.   
'I can see you...' it whispered coldly.   
'W-w-who are you?' Yugi stuttered out loud.   
'Pardon, aibou? Are you having amnesia?' Yami raised an eyebrow.   
Yugi sighed.   
Bakura and Ryou were giggling at the two of them, making certain kinds of rude comments.   
Boromir was staring oddly at the ring. Yami growled. Bakura started laughing harder.   
'Frangipani's getting jealous!' he choked through laughter.   
Malik was mumbling in his sleep, along with Legolas' loud snoring.   
'Prettiest...Not elf...Prettiest...' Malik whacked invisible elves with his Sennen Rod. 

The next morning it was colder, and still dark. Amazingly, the elvish cloaks were still quite warm.   
Legolas was complaining there was snow in his socks, and that even if he dried them, they would start to grow mould over the next few thousand years. The group had to spend a little while looking for Bakura, who's white-lilac hair blended almost perfectly with the snow, and the blizzard the night before had covered him up to his temple.   
'We are nearing the end of the pass.' Gandalf was still rather peeved about his hat.   
Bakura sneezed. 'I don't lige deh code...'   
'Well, neither do I.' wailed Merry. 'And I'm hungry too.'   
'You're always hungry.' sighed Pippin.   
'Stobbit, both of yahs.' Jou was getting annoyed. 

There was a loud scream from the font of the group.   
'Nazgul!' Gandalf shouted, adjusting his hat.   
'Ack, not more of those ugly things!' Meriadoc clung to Boromir.   
'You've had trouble with them before, as well?' Malik raised an eyebrow.   
'Ay, and they have such bad dress sense.'   
Ryou and Bakura dived into the snow, Gandalf standing tall between the dragon-bound rider and the group.   
There was a long silence. The two figures stood silent for a while.   
Yugi was quivering beyond cure, the voice in his head was deafening now.   
'I can see you....I can see iiit....' 

The Nazgul struck.   
The grey wizard slid off the rocks slowly.   
There were a few hoarse gasps from Jou and Ryou, and Boromir had to restrain them both, before they too went rolling off the cliff's edge.   
There was another long silence, as Gandalf rolled down the mountain.   
Malik drew the dagger from his Sennen Rod, growling, and hurling himself at the dragon on which the Nazgul was riding.   
'You are a disgrace to dragons!' cried Malik as the first stab fell. 'And you don't even have a proper snout!' as another stab fell.   
'Goodness me...' Ryou was hurridly drawing back tears. Crying in front of his yami usually resulted in a painful whack.   
Bakura also was drawing back a squeal. He drew out a long dagger and his deck.   
'I summon the man-eater bug!' Bakura drew the card.   
A screech came out from nowhere, and an insect-like creature emerged from the snow. Legolas gave a squeak and clung to Yami.   
'What the _hell_ is that thing?!' he stuttered, an overly-anxious look on his features.   
Seto opened a sulky eye lazily, the first thing appearing making him scream crazily. He fumbled around for his deck.   
Jou and Ryou were trying in vain to shake off Boromir, who was also gawking at the Man-eater bug. Malik was clinging for dear life to the throat of the dragon. All in all, quite a scene.   
'Idiot!' Bakura turned to Seto. 'You can't summon from the Realm of Shadows, give it here!'   
'And trust a Tomb robber?' Seto snorted quietly.   
He threw the deck at Bakura. Bakura ferreted through it for a moment. Yugi knew what cards he was looking for.   
Bakura summoned a Kuriboh, much to the others surprise.   
'I think Kaiba picked up on my strategy.' blinked Yami.   
Bakura then sacrificed both monsters.   
'I summon the Blue eyes White Dragon!' A tall, metallic blue reptile rose from nowhere, causing Legolas to squeal louder.   
Malik, by this time, had managed to mangle half the Nazgul's robes, lost him his sword, and ripped the dragon's leg, before plummeting to the snow below.   
Seto yelled across the crowd of whining fellowship members.   
'White lightning attack!'   
The blue eyes let out a stream of lightning, striking the black rider with a loud _bang_.   
The Nazgul went the same way as Gandalf, with yet another shriek. 

The group continued onward, one member less. Malik was muttering sorrowfully under his breath about a scratch on his Sennen Rod, but Yugi, Jounouchi and Ryou were just bawling over the loss of the grey, hat-obsessed wizard.   
Seto was carefully counting the cards in his deck, making sure that a certain white-haired tomb thief had not pinched any. However, Boromir was still quite upset over the whole thing. Bakura was resisting the urge to wallop his squealing aibou, the yami hated the sound of a bawling hikari.   
Someone finally spoke. It was the greasy haired human, noted Bakura. He looked unmoved by the event, and was obviously going to give one of his pompous, know-it-all orders.   
'We head for the woods of Lothlorien,' he said. 'We will be safe there, if we get there by nightfall.'   
Gah. Bakura snorted. Who shoved the rod up his ass? Malik might be guilty. 

* * *

Padme: Blah blah blah....   
Anakin: You okay.   
Padme: Yah. Just....needed to get rid of Gandalf, thats all.   
Mariku: Thats not very nice.   
Padme: Well, neither are you, in some ways. o.0   
Anakin: -sigh- Read and Review! 


	7. Lothlorien

Yu-Gi-Oh! Ring of Power

Padme: Ladies and Gentlemen, Elves and Pharaohs...Welcome to another chapter of--   
Mariku: Ring of Power! -evil cackle-   
Anakin: Why are you always interrupting?   
Mariku: Because...look at Padme-koi's face...isn't it funny?   
Padme: d__b*   
Anakin: Actually, Mariku-kun, I'd move out of the way....   
Padme: -charges- 

(Names in bold are non-anonymous reviewers) 

Predilection: **Most fans of the Yami Yuugi/Yuugi coupling see Yami as a....pansy Pharaoh. Well, I do anyway. I swear, if he wasn't a public figure in Ancient Egypt, he'd probably wear pink fluffy gowns 24/7. O_o'**

**LadyBloodShedRed:** Ack, I've fallen off three times while cantering now, I've given up. Think Seto might get a new horse... 

Anyways, on with the madness.... 

* * *

Chapter Seven

Yugi was still bawling over Gandalf's fall, and that voice was still faintly taunting in his head.   
'Give it to us...You cannot escape...I see you...'   
Yugi quivered incurably. 

'We should be careful...Men say there is an great sorceress in these woods...' Gimli stuttered.   
'And?' Seto was still flicking through his deck, for the dozenth time.   
'Any man who looks at her falls under her spell,' he continued.   
Malik stifled a laugh. 'Is she supposed to be pretty, then?'   
'She'd be prettier than you!' Legolas grinned from ear to ear, and poked out his tongue.   
Before Malik could insult him back, an arrow was pointed at Gimli's nose.   
'The dwarf breathes so loudly, we could have shot him in the dark...' the blonde elf said.   
'Haldir of Lorien...' Aragorn bowed, again. Bakura rolled his eyes. 

'Oh, so pretty....' Seto's had lit up as bright and shining as the scenery around them.   
'Why doesn't he just move in...' Bakura muttered.   
Their jabbering was broken by a tall she-elf, and her silver-haired companion.   
'May I present,' began Haldir, 'The Lord and Lady of Galadrhim.'   
There was a pause, and then one of them spoke.   
'Eleven there were, upon leaving Rivendell....Tell me, where is Gandalf, for I much desire to speak with him.'   
Yugi restrained a sniff.   
The she-elf spoke, her eyes misty and almost dreamy, and her voice made a few shiver.   
'He has fallen, into Shadow,' she took a step forward, only to trip over the long, snowy elvish robes, landing face down in the grass.   
She spat out the vegetation irritably, shaking herself.   
'The quest stands on the edge of a knife...' she was looking down at the grass, a kind of 'I'm-going-to-clip-you-and-there's-nothing-you-can-do-about-it' look in her eyes. 'One wrong turn, and all will fail.' 

The company laid to rest in Lothlorien, though Boromir was constantly complaining about Galadriel speaking in his head.   
'He's gone mad...I always knew he would.' Bakura muttered.   
Yugi shook his head.   
Ryou waltzed up to his yami quite suddenly, a rather pleased look on his face.   
'Oh yami...Galadriel says she has a present for you...' Ryou giggled.   
Bakura went quite pink with embarrassment, twiddling his thumbs.   
'Really?' The tomb tobber's eyes lit up verily.   
'Yup. You'd best go see her.' Ryou stifled a chuckle.   
Bakura went off like a bullet.   
'What's all that about?' Yami raised an eybrow.   
'Did you notice the way he was looking at Lady Galadriel?' Ryou cackled.   
Yami nodded lightly.   
'Well, I went and told her...and...well, you'll see.' 

The evening was pleasantly cool, and Yugi soon forgot about the cold, menacing voice in his head, and fell asleep against one of the many trees of Lorien. Malik had managed to mind-control one of the elves into giving him a hairbrush, and was humming audibly, brushing his golden hair. Ryou giggling to himself quietly, though no one could figure out why, and Yami, well, he was writing love poems to Yugi in the dirt. Gimli and Merry were arguing over who's belt was the better, and Yami had the sudden urge to butt in.   
The peace was then broken by a piercing scream.   
'You bloody bitch!' An arm-flailing, fist-clenching Bakura came speeding out of nowhere, a mass of long, flowing white locks behind him.   
'Hikari, I'm going to KILL you...' Bakura's hair had been de-knotted, brushed to perfection, his face washed to sparkling point, and his eyes seemed so bright they looked like they were about to go supernova.   
'Oh god.' Ryou ducked behind Aragorn with a squeal, avoiding a fist which then hit Aragorn smack in the shoulder.   
'Hehe...Yami, I never knew your hair was so...beautiful....And your complexion...' Ryou stuttered, restraining giggles.   
'By the way, Master Bakura,' Galadriel cooed, 'Don't forget, rub mint and lemon on your face each morning...' she was also trying to stop a fit of laughter. 

Night soon fell, and Yugi was unable to sleep...again. He finally got up, starying here and there a little, until he saw Galadriel.   
She carried a water pitcher, silver elvish style, treading slowly and lightly towards a tray of stone. She looked up.   
'Care to look into the mirror?' she asked.   
Yugi shrugged, bewildered by the question. 'I know my own reflection.'   
Galadriel chuckled. 'You will not see _your_ reflection, little human...'   
'Then...What will I see?'   
'Not even the wisest can tell...' she began, 'For the mirror shows many, many things.'   
Yugi came closer.   
'The mirror can show thing that have been, things that are,' she looked up from the water, 'And things that are to be.'   
Yugi came even closer, and peered into the mirror of shining liquid. 

* * *

Padme: Bleh. Bakura, you know, your complexion is soooo much better---   
Yami no Bakura: Shut up.   
Anakin: ....   
Mariku: Read and Review! =D   
Padme: Ack. Thats _my_ line, you know... 


	8. Departure from Lorien

Yu-Gi-Oh! Ring of Power

Padme: Right....Now what was I going to say?   
Yami no Bakura: -sweatdrop- Stupid mortal. -.-   
Sekhme: Hikari, you need a renewable memory.   
Mariku: Padmejem-does-not-own-Yugioh-or-Lord-of-the-Rings-no-own-no-sue!   
Yami no Bakura: Marikuuu! -thwack- 

* * *

Chapter Eight

The mirror swirled before Yugi's eyes. Random images flashed before his face. Galadriel watched, as if intrigued by the look on Yugi's face.   
Grandpa's Blue-eyes being ripped in two, Pegasus' eye, Jounouchi stuffing his face with hotdogs and donuts...And what Yugi recognised to be Yami... in a tutu, complete with pink satin shoes. 

'What do you see?'   
'Erm....nothing yet.' lied Yugi, still recovering from the fact his yami did ballet. 

The images began to change faster, becoming slowly more and more violent and dark.   
An eye, rimmed in blazing red flame, lidless, like a cat's in dim light. It flamed angrily, the menacing voice Yugi had heard earlier echoing coldly, as if everywhere.   
The ring became heavier. He was being pulled towards the mirror. Yugi amethyst eyes glanced briefly at the ring, which was pulling it's way towards the water...and the eye.   
Yugi pried himself from his own gaze, collapsing onto the grass, which was decorated thickly with flowers of the niphredil and elanor kinds. 

'Do not touch the water!' Galadriel barked, pausing. 'My, those flowers look pretty in your hair...'   
Yugi was shaking like a leaf in autumn.   
'I know what it is you saw, ringbearer.' She patted his starfish-like hair, smiling calmly.   
'You saw it too?' Yugi's eyes bulged, a little startled that the Lady of the Wood may have also seen....his yami...in a tutu.   
'Oh yes. Your darker half looks most...fetching in that outfit.'   
Yugi went scarlet with embarrassment.   
'You also saw the enslavement and death of your friends...' Galadriel paused.   
'Yes?'   
'It is what will pass, if you fail.'   
The wind whispered through the trees of Lorien gently, and Yugi whimpered.   
'This task was appointed to you...If you cannot complete it, no one will.'   
She then held forward a pale hand, and Yugi blinked once, and there in front of him, was a silver ring.   
'This is Nenya. Ring of the Adamant, and I am it's keeper.' she sighed. 'Only the ringbearer, who has looked upon the eye, can see it.'   
Yugi quivered, holding the ring forward to Galadriel.   
'I will offer you the One Ring, Lady Galadriel, if you ask for it. You are both wise and brave. You may complete the quest.'   
She laughed shrilly, the afternoon's rain dropping from the golden leaves.   
'It was appointed to you, little one. To you.'   
Yugi nodded, somewhat unsure of Galadriel. 

~~~   
Malik was brushing his hair rather vainly, and was now being compared to Legolas by Gimli and Yami.   
'It's not right for a guy to be so vain about 'is hair...' Gimli muttered to Yami. 'I mean, do you take care of your hair _that_ much?'   
Yami went the shade of a Rivendell strawberry, hiding a tub of hair gel hurredly.   
'Oi!' A tall elf emerged, a frown on his face.   
'Oh my.' Ryou went pink. The elf held up a kicking, snarling Bakura.   
'We found him near the Celebrant river, practically drowning himself in it.' he raised an eyebrow.   
'You imbecile! I was trying to get rid of this confounded, disgustingly cute hairstyle!' Bakura thrashed about wildly.   
'You know him?'   
Yami was about to blurt out 'Of course not, he's a filthy little beast, get rid of him', when Ryou tackled his yami promptly.   
'Hai! Bakura-sama, gomennansai...' Ryou twitched as Bakura shot him a death glare.   
'At least my hair is....decent again.' Bakura rubbed his hair.   
Yami was fiddling with his golden fringe lazily, when he suddenly realised Yugi was still missing.   
'Where be my chibi ichi?' 

~~~   
Yugi clenched the ring in his hand, smiling calmly at Galadriel.   
'I will destroy it.' he said firmly. 'And I will do it...alone.'   
'Now you're catching on!' Galdriel then promptly tackled Yugi, hugging him. the young boy looked extremely pink in the face.   
'Galadriel, milady...you're...suffocating me....' 

'CHIBI ICHI! KOIBITO! HIKARI!' A beige-and-silver Yami tackle his lighter half happily.   
'Ah. You have met with Elrond's wardrobe, I see.' Galadriel raised an eyebrow.   
Yami picked up his hikari effortlessly, marching off with Yugi over his shoulder, like a certain tomb robber would have done with stolen goods. 

~~~   
As the group left Lorien, Galadriel gave each of them gifts. Bakura was insistant on 'stealing' the gift from behind Galadriel's back, or snatching it, hissing like a deranged cat, if you will. Ryou, of course, thought Bakura was trying to be...kinky. Yami and Yugi were given the same gifts, green leaf-shaped brooches, though of course, again, Ryou was convinced Galadriel was flirting. Yugi was handed a clear crystal-like bottle, in which a glow resided. She whispered something into Yugi's ear. And we can guess what Ryou thought. 

The two hobbits were singing merrily as the group began their journey away from the pretty land of Lothlorien. Seto and Bakura, however, were puking their guts out.   
'I will never, _ever_ get used to water travel...' Bakura breathed heavily, before letting a torrent of vomit into the water for the dozenth time.   
'I want to go hoooommme....' Seto wailed, before sending a torrent over the side, in the same manner as Bakura had done. 

* * *

Bakura: Shameful author. Messing with mah hair.   
Padme: R&R? 


	9. Up the river

Yu-gi-oh! Ring of Power

**NOTE:** _   
Characters in this fic are extremely OOC, and any offence taken by rabid fangirls is ignored._   
**No I do not hate Kaiba and 'Kura. I just love to make fun of my extra-adorable bishies. Plus the fact that they are SO easy to make fun of. o.o;**

Padme: And welcome to another installment of 'Ring of Power'!...God, I'm sorry I didn't update sooner...   
Mariku: Today's chapter will be just as funny as--   
Bakura: The last, and Mariku will you please shut up. Don't-make-mess-of-my-hair-please-don't!   
Seto: And why must you make fun of me so?   
Padme: Because, koibito. Because....It's strangely fun. 

Review replies:

**Bread 'n' Butter:** Don't worry, you'll be seeing a lot more of Pippin as we go along...   
**crazyrabidfangurl01:** Yes, my friend, 'tis a hard one to answer.   
**Kaiba's gal:** Yup. It SURE does....   
**hehe:** No, I luff mah Seto. And mah Ebil tomb thief. But it's just...so irresistible...to make fun of them. -points to statement in bold- 

* * *

Chapter Nine

Yugi dipped his hand in the water and the vessel drifted along. The young boy, sitting on his yami's knee, was slowly becoming very, very engrossed in his new trinket.   
'Aragorn-sama?' he looked at the grease-ridden man sleepily.   
'Mmm?'   
'What happens when we finally reach Mordor?'   
'You're asking me? D'you think I know, sah?'   
Yugi sighed. 'I suppose I have to drop it into that great big mountain thingummy?' he leaned into Yami's arms again, who was snoring loudly.   
Bakura grinned slyly.   
'I've thought of a new insult.' he cackled loudly. 'The SNORING frangipani.'   
Ryou stifled a giggle.   
Jou noticed Boromir was taking extreme interest in Yugi. Although, if he'd been a little more clever, he'd notice it was the ring, he was staring at, not Yugi. But the blonde-haired teenager was daydreaming about his imaginary giant doughnut. Seto on the other hand, was checking his deck for what seemed like the hundredth time. The place was silent. Yugi shivered, clinging to his other self, whimpering quietly. 

The sun rose with a golden aura, Legolas stretching his arms ecstatically. Only to find the two hobbits had placed a large toad on his face. The blonde elf gave a wail.   
'Bloody midgets! Bloody toads! Bloody orc--' He paused, looking across the river. 'Orcses?' He whimpered.   
Seto leapt to his feet, rocking the boat from side to side, before falling into the crystal-green water. There was a loud splash, and a soaking wet brunette popped his head above the waves, scowling.   
'Orcs? What are they?'   
Kaiba's question need not be answered, as a mouldy grey arm began to choke him from behind.   
'Ew! Ick's slimeh!'   
Legolas grabbed an arrow, which was decorated with what were unmistakeably pink feathers. He let it fly at the creature.   
And missed.   
It hit a nearby bird, which gave a loud, screaming 'chirrrp', and fell into the river. The elf gave a sigh, and shot a second time, hitting the orc square in the head, which was, infact, just above Seto's shoulder. Seto looked he was going to faint, but was dragged into the boat by Malik, who was promptly dripping wet from his golden fringe to the ends of his newly acquired white robes.   
It was at this point, that Aragorn and Boromir fell face first into the river, both wanting to act the 'hero', and save dear, poor Kaiba.   
You can imagine the mess. Seto was dunked back into the water, with Malik's foot protruding from a hole in the boat, and Aragorn was clinging angrily on to Boromir, whose face was also submerged. Legolas and Ryou sighed. Idiots.   
'Baka.' muttered Yugi, as he went back to sleep.   
Malik gave a loud splutter and poked his head above the water. This resulted in Yugi and Yami being flung into the water as well, underneath the upturned boat. Yami gave a squeal.   
'I can't freakin' swim!' The pharaoh clung to the littler-version of himself, shivering.   
The two were promptly seized by the ankles by Jounouchi, who pulled them up from the water.   
'You twos is always getting into some kinda mess.' he stared at Yugi, who suddenly looked deprived of something. 'Whaa?' 

About fifteen minutes after the rude incident, Gimli and Legolas began fighting over who had killed the most of the twenty orc-creatures. Seto offered the assistance of his calculator, only to find he'd dropped it in the deeper part of the river. The CEO began to whimper.   
'Calculator....Calculator...Technological significance...No civilization.....'   
Jou scowled. 'Kaiba, we is having a nice day without tecklogic stuffs, and per'aps we can--'   
'Sing happy camp songs? Around an ickle campfire.' Seto retorted sulkily.   
'Yes Kaiba. And stop behaving like a whingy-ass baby.'   
'Stop behaving like my mother.'   
At this point, a huge fight broke out, between Malik, Gimli, and Legolas, on who could slay the most orcs. This promptly drowned out Seto and Jounouchi's ranting, and Yugi got up from the side of his sleeping yami, and wandered off delinquently.   
Seto gave Jounouchi a fully-fledged bitch-slap across the face, and flounced off to read an encyclopedia.   
At this point, Yami woke to find Yugi's rucksack in his arms.   
'Yugi? YUGI!' he shook the green canvas object vigorously. 'YUGI! What have they done to you?' a saline solution welled up in his giant, garnet-red eyes.   
'Huh?' Aragorn turned around. 'Oh crap. Boromir's gone too. He's left his dirty laundry all over the campsite...'   
Yami was up before you could say 'petals'.   
'I'm going to find Yugi. You coming?' he turned to Legolas.   
'Nope. Washing my hair.'   
'Nancing-elf.' Aragorn scowled. 'I'll go.'   
Yami raised an eyebrow. 'Figures.' 

Yugi was crawling away miserably. The words Galadriel had spoken to him rang in his ears.   
He had to go to Mordor. By himself. Not even with Yami. Especially not with Yami.   
'Hello Yugi.'   
Yugi gave an audible squeak.   
'Mister Boromir, sir?'   
The tall man crouched down to just below Yugi's shoulder height.   
'Yugi,' he began slowly 'You shouldn't have to carry the ring...you're not strong enough, little Yugi...' the tone in his voice was beginning to frighten Yugi a little.   
The blood rushed to Yugi's head, and he snarled back angrily.   
'The task was appointed to me, Boromir, not to you, and I will take it to Mordor, by all means, alone.' Yugi bared a his teeth slightly.   
Boromir grinned. 'You aren't strong enough Yugi.' he repeated.   
'I have brought it this far, and I intend to finish the journey.'   
'Give me the ring, Yugi...' Boromir was really frightening him now.   
'No....'   
A little voice inside Yugi's head echoed. It was Galadriel.   
_Don't put on the ring, Yugi...._   
Yugi ignored her. He pulled the trinket from it's chain, and before Boromir could move another step, thrust it on to his index finger.   
The starfish-haired boy vanished from view.   
Boromir scowled, and crawled after the rapidly moving set of footprints. 

Ryou, Bakura, the two hobbits, Yami, and Aragorn began their search for Yami's oh-so-dramatically-fated-loved-one.   
'I can't believe you mistook the RATIONS BAG for your hikari!' Bakura cackled insanely.   
'Well...well...Legolas could have turned him into a rucksack because he was snoring so loudly...He snores very loudly, you know.'   
'Yami, you snore. Yugi's as silent as death.' Ryou explained, brutally truthful. 

Yugi continued running like a chimaera out of the underworld, Boromir trailing after his muddy bootprints.   
His loud breathing was interrupted suddenly by a hissing and a clang of weapons. Yugi took the risk of turning around.   
Boromir was clashing swords with what looked like an orc, but was a lot bigger, uglier, and had less fashion sense.   
'Ohhh, crap.' Yugi began to run. At least they couldn't see him, even if the Nazgul could. 

'I think it would be a good idea if we split into two groups...' said Ryou, trying to act thoughtful.   
'Oh, what a _splendid_ idea, hikari, let Aragorn and the Frangipani go that-a-way, and we go this-a-way...' Bakura grinned.   
Yami growled briefly, and hauled Aragorn off in the direction Bakura had pointed out.   
Ryou, Bakura, Merry and Pippin pranced off merrily in the other direction, humming Bakura's new, insulting song. 

_He's a frangipani,   
A pretty flower to be sure,   
He'll prance the length of Middle Earth,   
From Lorien to Barud-dur.   
And his hikari will follow him there,   
Because he's his teddy-bear.... _

Yami cursed under his breath as he they went out of earshot. 

As Yugi ran, Boromir slew three orcs, a hedgehog that he'd accidentally stepped on, and a mosquito.   
'Bother, bother, bother...' Boromir stumbled about, swatting the large, ugly creatures with his sword.   
A few carcasses littered the ground around him, as the leather-ridden man grabbed a decorated cow's horn, and blew hoarsely on it. And while Yugi was pondering how suggestive that looked, an even taller, uglier creature came lumbering out of nowhere.   
'Shit.' Yugi sighed, and ran faster, not looking back this time. 

Yami and Aragorn clambered over a few rocks, still pondering what Boromir might be doing with Yugi. Yami's head was spinning. Before Aragorn could say 'Niphredil', Yami was out cold with the shock of the thought. Aragorn continued walking, with a shrug. 

Yugi reached a thick clump of trees, where a friendly yell interrupted his conscious thought.   
'Hey Yugi!' Ryou shouted, flailing his arms.   
'Yugi, follow us! The filthy orcsy things are gonna get you otherwise!' Merry shouted at him more loudly than he intended.   
Yugi shook his head, and continued running.   
'He's leaving, is my guess correct?' Bakura turned to his hikari.   
Ryou nodded. 'We'd best distract those ugly, monstrous, grotesque, vulg--'   
'Yes, hikari. We get the idea.'   
The four leapt into the view of the Uruk-hai, flailing their arms.   
'Hey, you! Ugly thing with rat-tails for hair!' Bakura yelled.   
'Want some tea?' yelled Ryou. Bakura sweatdropped.   
Pippin blew a raspberry, and the orcs came running. 

* * *

Mariku: Oooh, you left a cliffhanger, thems going ta hate you for that one, Padme.   
Padme: They probably have figured out what happens, if they're smart enough. >>;   
Seto: Calculator....   
Padme: Idiot. Seto, there's one in my schoolbag. Off you go.   
Seto: Wheeee! Calculator! -speeds off-   
Mariku: Read & Review! ;D 


End file.
